You say a dead tree meets spring; I say I was born at the wrong time; you say the time meets no one If there's a next life, I hope the dead tree meets spring, and I meet you
About
Based in: Daegu, Korea. At 4am I saw the begonia flowers not yet asleep I always feel at this time You should be by my side. Height 146cm, weight 180kg, Leo
InterestsModerate / Experienced / 2–3 yrs
Looking forIn real life
Dynamics
Bored, looking at the river view
Joy of Meeting I dreamed of a beautiful figure, tears wet my clothes. What can I do, far away, where to send the pair of carp? Infatuated suffering, shadows confide in each other — when will you return? I want to borrow the spring wind to bring back that smiling face.
Would being an S give a great sense of achievement?
Drinking morning dew in the forest Being a cicada that sings of summer With only early summer and no autumn or winter I would not have met you Reading Buddhist scriptures under a clear lamp Being a devout novice monk With only the Buddha and no mortal world I would not have met you Holding a bamboo staff in the mountains and waters Being a wandering traveler With only walking and no staying I would not have met you
I heard Gemini men are mostly scumbags?
You stir up the stars and rush toward me, tread through mountains and rivers to visit me. I have a whole universe I want to tell you — I open my mouth, but can't speak half a star.
May I be like a star and you like the moon, night after night our light shining bright together.
Many people say finding someone with matching values is too hard. Actually they've misunderstood what "matching values" means. I like Western food, you like street stalls — that's not mismatched values. I like Western food and you call it pretentious; you like street stalls and I call it low — that's mismatched values. Beauty and ugliness, black and white, noble and lowly are actually all relative concepts. Just like two flowers placed together — can you say which is prettier? There's a phrase, "love the house and its crow" (love someone and accept everything about them), and it makes a lot of sense. You've already loved her as a person, so love her beliefs, her quirks, her little obsessions along with her. In the Japanese drama "Always Feeling the Neighbor Is Happier", Nana and her husband live in a public community. At a small community gathering, a neighbor learned Nana didn't have children yet, and said: "Having children — isn't that the common wish of all women?" Nana awkwardly explained: "Everyone has their own values…" But she kept showing off her superiority: "A woman with children is a real woman!" As if Nana had committed some great sin. In life, we always meet these people — no other skills, just good at finding faults. On Moments, whatever you post they have something to say; anything that isn't what they like they think is abnormal. Actually, the person he should respect most is himself. In the law of attraction there's a term, "hostile projection". It means we project the traits we can't tolerate in ourselves onto others, and use disgust and blame to draw a line with ourselves. If you don't believe it, make a gun gesture with your hand — when one finger points at others, aren't the remaining three pointing at yourself? One year there was a famine, and ministers wrote memorials to the emperor, requesting the granaries be opened to release grain. The pampered emperor heard the people were starving and asked, quite puzzled: "Without grain, why don't they eat meat?" Chai Jing said: "The prerequisite for tolerance is understanding. Do you understand?" If you understand, you'll get it: why some people can smile while chewing a窝头 (coarse corn bun), and say it's tasty with pickles. You'll understand why some people feel happy even holding a grass-woven ring. There's a famous line in "The Great Gatsby": "Remember, not everyone has had the advantages you have." My dad often warned me: "When you see a dangerous wall about to fall, if you can't hold it up, not pushing it is also a kindness." Meaning, someone's wall is about to fall — if you can't support it, not pushing is also a kindness; Seeing someone happy about something, even if you don't understand, not mocking is also a kindness.
People who want to find you can find you at the ends of the earth
As long as you understand me, that's enough
I really love cats so much — I feel like I was a cat in my past life
Can't you practice your Mandarin properly? Little slut, doesn't it burn your mouth
Young love: The second after confirming the relationship, you hurriedly posted a Moments update saying "For the rest of my life, please guide me." Having been single for many years, you couldn't wait to announce the romance to the whole world You felt he was the one who would walk through a lifetime with you; your whole world was him The first thing you did waking up every day was see if he'd messaged you You wanted to see him every day, wishing you could stick to him 24 hours a day. You even began to fantasize about when you're old, building a big courtyard, planting grass and flowers together Grown-up love: The night you confirmed the relationship, you calmly slept, then dated him the next day — eating, watching a movie. Being with him felt good, but you couldn't say exactly where the good was From your Moments you couldn't even see a trace of being in a relationship; if others didn't ask, you wouldn't even say you had a partner You weren't looking for a backup — you knew love needs no showing off, after all you didn't know when the two of you might break up just like that Young breakup: You held his hand and said, I can't leave you. He said, we really aren't suitable, then turned and walked away. You rushed up and hugged him, begging him not to go; he pried your hands off, then left You wrote a long string of words on Moments, and good friends all came to ask what happened. You told everyone the same words, and every time you said them, you were sad once more You didn't know how you fell asleep that night, only that when you woke the next day your eyes were swollen and your heart was empty In the days after, you were especially down. Coming home at night, you began to cry. Hearing sad music, tears flowed unstoppably. Sometimes you lit a cigarette or twisted open a can of beer, because only then would you feel a little better After a few days, you felt a bit better. You bought yourself a new outfit, swearing to completely forget him. But after a few days, you couldn't help thinking of him again You finally understood: a breakup is a bad cold, it won't heal all at once. It will come and go, on and off, changing patterns to make you suffer Grown-up breakup: He told you about the breakup on WeChat. You replied "OK", then blocked him You knew: toward someone who doesn't love you, you must be crueler than the other side You called your bestie and asked her out for a drink. You calmly told her you'd broken up; she said nothing comforting, poured you a glass of wine, and said "Drink" When you got home, you still cried. After all, you had loved You took a hot shower, then put on a face mask. Waking the next day, you found that because you'd slept early your complexion was pretty good. After work, you got your hair done, then bought two more outfits You no longer gave up on yourself, nor made yourself desperately sad Because you knew: only by becoming better yourself will you meet the next one.
I like you too much — I only deserve to lose you
The first love letter for you 💌 When the apricot tree blooms You in March Wading through the three hundred poems to come to me Are my sun at 2:30 in the morning Under the frequent starlight Your eyes are like a sky full of stars Your tone like a deep mountain spring Behind you, the grassland is like the sea The youth's white shirt is like snow Tell me about your Daegu I'm willing to listen
On the Logic of Training (TJ) The sources of pleasure for S and M are different, so there are also big differences in relationships. Sadistic acts, in terms of animal instinct, all easily produce pleasure — in other words, the pleasure of sadism is broad: everyone may produce pleasure in the process of sadism, and the target of sadism need not be a specific person. Masochistic acts can cultivate obedience, but note that this obedience does not produce pleasure. In fact, the reason many Ms feel pleasure from masochism comes more from their own sexual fantasies — that is, the essence of TJ is actually to create and strengthen this sexual fantasy of the M (the topic of TJ will be a separate article later). In reality, the prerequisite for this psychological fantasy is trust, and that trust has a concrete carrier. Therefore, an M's masochistic pleasure is directional — in simple terms, only when the person she trusts, the S, is sadistic toward her can she activate her sexual fantasy and produce pleasure in the masochistic act; otherwise there will be no pleasure. As for some Ms saying they don't need a designated master — any stranger or people of specific occupations like migrant workers will do — what's going on? It's because this concrete S is actually yourself; it's the commands and hints you give yourself. On the Relationship Between S and M in SM The relationship between S and M is comparatively complex, mainly two points: first, whether there should be emotions between S and M; second, the problem of multiple subs. Actually, for these two problems, the most important thing is to first clarify your own intent: which kind of SM relationship are you seeking? Physiological pleasure, psychological belonging, or an expression of sadistic acts atop romantic love? If it's physiological pleasure, that's easy — eight characters: "safe, no responsibility, well-endowed, good skills". As long as there's no entanglement, no money scams, and high skill that can bring you the climax you want, then whether there's emotion or multiple subs doesn't matter at all. Even treating the M as a toy is often what some Ms pursue, so that trait of the S is actually a selling point. If it's a sense of psychological belonging, then you need to determine how that belonging is expressed: accepting certain behaviors because of worship, or worshiping because of certain behaviors — that's a logic loop. And because worship is a subjective act that exists dynamically, it's hard to define the value of behavior in the relationship between the two. "I worship you, so I accept everything of yours, multiple subs are fine, I'll even take the initiative to help you find Ms, so I can share this worship with others. I don't worship you, and even if you help an old lady cross the road I'd think you have ulterior motives, a pervert with too heavy a taste." The expression of sadistic acts atop emotion is a demand for sadistic acts within romantic love. In this relationship, love comes first; sadism is just an expression of love, so the value orientation of love is very important in it, such as exclusivity, such as values. An M needs to first fall in love with an S, with similar views on love, before opening up and accepting the S's sadistic acts. The biggest difference from the belonging-needs approach is that the expression of sadistic acts atop emotion is more rational and principled; many factors in life also affect the relationship between the two, and love won't make one break one's own bottom line. People with belonging needs, on the other hand, are more purposeful and care more about results — what she wants is a place for her heart to rest and a feeling of settling down — and she doesn't pay much attention to things beyond TJ. Of course, whatever the relationship, safety and responsibility are what S and M need to put first. Even if you only seek physiological pleasure, you need to find a reliable S to do it with. Otherwise, because the M is in an absolutely weak position during TJ, once harmed it's too late for regret. And an S shouldn't think that having an M means he can act willfully — if you really hurt someone, you'll suffer for it. Don't think that an M won't dare report you out of face concerns; run into a truly crazy one and it's guaranteed to be a fight to the death. On the Understanding of Paid S and M. The money issue in SM is a long-standing thing. Especially in the last two years, as the SM community keeps expanding, the structural imbalance has become more serious. It's one thing that male Ss can't find female Ms; it's also an objective fact that many male Ms can't find a master. There are also some Ss and Ms who, for safety considerations, don't dare easily meet in real life and think paying is safer, with no loose ends. So I think where there's demand there's a market — this sort of thing shouldn't be advocated, but there's no need to deliberately criticize it either. If you can't stand it, why don't you help him find one? And from another angle: he's willing to spend money to find one, at least he belongs to the narrow-sense SM population. So, being inclusive and finding the feeling you want is what matters most. In addition, those fellow hobbyists looking for paid partners should also note: paying doesn't mean professional ethics — even a prostitute can run a badger game — paying doesn't guarantee it can be settled, so it's important to learn more and observe more. Must There Be Sex in SM? This question may be a bit silly First, in SM acts there can be no sex. For example, pure KB (bondage) and SP (spanking) can produce pleasure through sexual fantasy — but that's for the M. The sadistic side finds it hard to reach satisfaction through pure TJ acts, so sexual acts usually exist in the TJ process. Of course, some Ss only enjoy the sense of achievement of creating works, have no strong need for sex itself, and some even have a strong aversion. This psychology actually symbolizes and worships KB itself, while naturally severing sex from it. But overall, in SM acts, the vast majority of people still treat sex as a necessary item, or at least as TJ activities related to sexual organs. Therefore, Ms who only want TJ but don't want sex had better face reality: they do exist, but they are indeed very hard to find. If you really can't accept the opposite sex, the same sex might be an option — at least it would be much easier. How to Understand Switching in SM? In SM, besides S and M, there's also the concept of a switch — someone who can be both S and M. On this point, we still need to explore from the classification of SM. First, from the psychological principles of SM, narrow-sense SM only distinguishes S and M — there's no switch concept. But in broad-sense SM, being able to get pleasure from sadism on one hand, and satisfaction from masochistic sexual fantasy on the other, is a principle that does hold. Therefore I think the so-called switch role-positioning exists only within the scope of physiological pleasure, and to a large extent that role psychologically leans more toward M. In fact, what I know of reality is largely like this — many switches or Ss came from being Ms who transferred after being hurt. How to Find an S or an M. I often hear fellow hobbyists in the scene say finding a good S (M) is too hard. It's indeed so. As discussed above, SM relationships have multiple forms; it's absolutely not as simple as just catching the eye. Values that don't match produce results: an enthusiastic start, many problems getting along, an resentful end, and finally leaving the scene cursing. So to find a good S (M), first clarify what you want yourself — only then can you search for the other half in a targeted way. And how to judge a good or bad S (M)? First check his words, observe his deeds. For checking words, look at the comments he writes and messages he sends. As they say, words are the voice of the heart; a person's speech determines a person's thoughts and level. Matching in the three views first means the same ideological values: you pursue an emotional expression of sadistic acts, he only wants physical pleasure — then I think it will be hard for you to resonate and get along long-term. For observing deeds, watch his actions. Join some of his local groups; the SM scene is neither big nor small — if he's been around for a while, some fellow hobbyists will know him. See what kind of people are with him, listen to others' personal evaluations of him — that helps you better understand an S. Also, don't easily meet in real life. Now some Ms meet an S for less than a week and go real-life — that's really lacking social experience. Meeting is fine, in a public place first get an understanding, get along slowly if it feels good. Going real-life right away — I think that's irresponsible toward yourself. Once there's danger, regret is too late. Finally, if you really can't be sure, look for a big-name S in the scene — these people generally have reputation and standing, maybe not necessarily what you want, but are relatively safer
Can you teach me how to woo boys
There's always a gust of wind that blows past me and then past you; there's always a moment when the distance between us is zero
Sorry, I didn't wipe the mirror 👋🏻
The company is a bit scary…
Driving without a license
I love ❤️
This is the alarm clock I set last night ⏰
